Stuff I hate (as well as my two cents)
Submitted by 5intheface on Tue, 11/30/2004 - 11:51
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- Emo music, and the Emo kids who follow it religiously.~ It's whiny, and its crap. The whole style is just a huge orgasm of teenage angst and confusion, desperetly wanting to fit into a social stereotype, but not sure who is the coolest, so they blend the punk, hippie, goth, and preppy styles all together to make a bastard child of teenage stupidity.
- People who worship Kurt Cobain~ Nirvana was highly influential, like them or not, I'll give them credit for that. But should they be? A group of mediocre (at best) musicians, masking thier ignorance with feedback and distortion, and "singing" by screaming with no style whatsoever. And they turned it into all the rage so music following it from thier on may try to be as shitty, but end up being even shittier. It's like failing at failing.
- People who worship Sid Vicious~ At least with Kurt he was at least a semi-talented lyricist. Where are any redeeming qualities of a shitty bassist who's band ushered in a legacy of terrible music to come, who was severe drug abuser that killed himself and probably his girlfriend. So let's remember him on a t-shirt!
- When its been 5 months and counting and the library STILL doesn't have my CDs on hold in yet.~ There's no excuse. I'm one of the probably 10 people that get music from the library anyway....
- When kids over-quote one-liners from funny movies and tv shows to the point where they aren't funny anymore~ There's always those kids that think that if they recite Adam Sandler movie quips over and over that they just get funnier and funnier. Well, they don't. And the same goes for the kids who think that quoting a joke from Chappelle's Show or South Park means they know what thier talking about.
- Idiots who argue on the internet~ To quote and awful e-mail I once recieved, "Arguing on the internet is like winning the Special Olympics; even if you win, you're still retarded." I don't see the fun in it. You have to argue enough already with those pricks at school that think that you voicing your opinion threatens the integrity of thiers, so I see no reason to waste my time doing it at home too.
- Instant Messaging~ I'd much rather write a letter. But since people are too lazy to get stamps and write on paper (myself included) I like to write e-mails. But using IM is just agrivating because people will talk to a dozen other people at the same time and type in some indeciferable code or foreign language called, "leet" that looks like they typed it using thier ass cheeks.
- When people who think they know everything think that because they haven't heard of something, it isn't important, because THEY know everything...~ Example: I love Jaco Pastorius. This guy at lunch thinks he is God of music, but dismisses Jaco as anything important, because HE hasn't heard of him. Because you know everything about music if you listen to Rush, and Miles Davis is just some stupid joke from Billy Madison.
- John Stewart and The Daily Show~ I used to think I was the only person who thought so but it appears I have a few allies. I guess to all our 14-16 year-old political super-geniuses, John Stewart is the smartest man alive. To me, the uncivilized folk, he's just another reject from Mtv trying to have his own show and fails to be funny.
- Baby Blues~ The show sucks.
- Queer Eye for the Straight guy, and other media that stereotype gays~ Not all gays are like that. In fact, pretty much most gay guys aren't, especially if they don't live in California. It just bugs me.
- Kids that claim they're gay/bi-sexual for attention~ I don't believe I need to explain myself further.
- Lunch Ladies~ I see lunch ladies at my school driving Mustangs. But then they act like the have the worst job in the world. Hey, I'm sure it sucks, but can you get on with your life enough to make sure to give the CHEESE pizza and not the pepperoni, and not get any hair in it? I have many more stories where that came from...
- People who are Super-Religious and won't listen to anyone else's opinion~ You can love God, that's great. But don't stuff it down our throats and try to justify you being a racist, bigoted bastard because you're a Christian. I don't think that's how it works.
- Those idiots who sue for anything~ It's your fault your fat, not McDonalds'.
- People who assume that because you're a vegetarian, you're out to steal all thier meat and bury it and harrass them about how "animals are people too."~ Yeah, I'm a vegetarian. But I don't like talking about it for that reason. I say nothing other than, "I don't eat meat..." before I start getting interrogated about why I'm trying to force them to change thier carnivorous ways. It's so annoying, as are all the same tired jokes you get for it.
- Jim Morrison~ Basically mesh the Kurt and Sid ones at the top together and you've got Jim Morrison.
- People who hate Bob Dylan because he "Can't sing"~ Let us completely ignore how he completely changed the face of music and how incredible his song lyrics are and how amazing his arrangemants and songs are, because your in chorus class and think that singing is simply hitting a note in tune. Yes, you're a moron.
- The majority of music around today~ It sucks. Did I really need to say that?
- People who pretend to know what you're talking about when they have no clue~ Example: "Hey Jeff, have you heard that song by Frank Zappa called Necrophiliac?" "...Yeah, but not in a while, it's a kickass song." "Jeff, I just made that up." My point.
- Halo~ To be fair, it is probably a fun game if you waste your time getting good at it. But I suck at video games, and the two times I played Halo, it pissed me off using two joysticks and the radar and trying to figure out what the hell was going on. But what I hate more is:
- Kids playing Halo~ They're usually regular people who turn into huge blubbering pussys and assholes. Always whining about how one's cheating or how you're looking at thier screen. Argh, they drive me nuts.
- People who, whenever you are carrying an instrument to class, demand to see it to ask what kind it is like they know and to play one stupid shitty riff they learned at last week's guitar lesson and try to brag because they've only been playing since Christmas.
- Road rage~ When I drive with my Dad, he makes me feel bad for NOT yelling at all the other drivers.
- Internet lingo and intentional grammatical and spelling errors to make it "cool"~ You're not cool, you're just illiterate. Its annoying to read and you look stupid. Stop it.
- Goth kids~ Oh man, you're really cool and so not like anyone else aren't you? I think I'll go vandalize stuff and smoke cigarettes before my mom has to pick me up to go home in her minivan to be as cool as you....
- The word poser~ The people using it are the ones who are too insecure about themselves and have to accuse others of copying them to flatter themselves.
- Using 'gay' as a synonym for stupid~ It's just sad that you lack a vocabulary large enough to find a synonym that actually fits, as well as it's just wrong.
- People who brag about smoking pot or getting drunk~ It's not cool, it's pathetic. And I'm not impressed. It just means you can't hold your liquer and are weak-minded and give in easily to peer pressure. It also means you're desperate to fit in and be accepted by people who don't actually care about you. Real cool.
- Senior guys in High school who date freshman girls for the easy poon~ Same goes to those skanks who feel they have to date a senior to make it in High school.
- Rolling Stone magazine~ This magazine is terrible. First off, who couldn't be a music critic? You just have to listen to music and like it or not. Whoah, that's hard. Why should care about some asshole who thinks he's better than the world's opinion as law? I don't get paid for throwing my opinions aorund. And I'll never forgive Rolling Stone for making that horrible 100 greatest guitarists list. I really hate Rolling Stone.
- VH1~ Are you a pop-culture nostalgia channel or a shitty music countdown channel? Who f'n cares, you suck VH1
- Mtv~ It's false advertising. As a person who takes music very seriously, I would think music television to be about music. That and Music videos suck too. Everything on this channel reeks of dumbassery.
- Every reality tv show~ from the moment I first saw Survivor in sixth grade I hated reality shows. My hatred has only grown since.
- When people accuse a band of selling out~ Not a day goes by that you don't sell out. Could it be that they are actually expanding musically and becoming something other than a one-dimesional band? Or could it be that you touch yourself at night (thank you Family Guy)
- Starbucks~ and all those aweful fu-fu coffee drinks for sissies. I'm sorry, if you drink coffee, drink it right; black. Maybe if it's particularly shitty, a very small amount of cream. But when you flood it with milk and sugar you've made it really gross and pointless.
- James Taylor~ He sings like he doesn't care. Yeah, I know everyone's going to hate me for this one.
- Internet Open Diaries/Live Journals~ They're dumb. Are you so self-concious about fitting in that you have to reduce yourself to spilling your heart out to annoymous internet losers you argue over weather of not thier Lindsey Lohan porn is real or not? If no one cares for you in real life, no one cares for you on the internet. And if they do they're a bigger loser than you are. the only good diary in mine. http://www.opendiary.com/entrylist.asp?authorcode=D313003
- Mad TV~ I never liked the magazine much either. It's just stupid and repetitive. Stewart might have been funny for half of the first time you saw him and then he does the same damn thing every sketch. That and the actors don't hold a candle to the likes of the talent on Saturday Night Live, Kids in the Hall, or hell, even early All-that.
- Christmas music~ There's a reason you hear it once a year; because it sucks. It's the same damn songs recorded by the same damn artists on a new CD that everyone rushes out to buy that you end up hearing at every single damn store you walk into.
- Almost everything involving "punk"~ The only thing that are punk that don't suck is Greenday, and maybe something else but I don't care enough to be bothered to think out it.
- Mohawks~ I hate looking at these. Thier ugly, and don't make you cool or hardcore. They mean that you look like a vagina.
- People who botch suicide~ Congratulations you selfish son-of-a-bitch! You've failed at failing. How hard is it to shoot yourself in the face? You're the lowest form of life on the planet. Are you happy? look at all the attention you've got, isn't that what you wanted?
- Politics~ Hearing all those phony bastards talk shit just annoys me.
- Drawn together~ This show isn't funny at all. It's like it was written by 6th graders
- Mopeds~ Get a bike. Its looks less retarded, and goes just as fast and is healthier for you and the enviroment, fat ass.
- When you ask someone what music they listen to and they reply, "...Well, I listen to everything."~ No you don't, so don't lie. There's for sure some music that you don't care for and if not that, I know there's music you'v enever heard for sure. You aren't that agreeable to like everything.
- People who can't laugh at themselves, especially when they make fun of other people
- People who try to show off on guitar or bass because they know a couple Les Claypool licks and think that they are really good, but don't know shit about playing.
- Talk Shows~ They're all the same and all just ways to get celebrities to appear god-like
- Martin Lawrence~
- People who tell you that you don't hate something, you only 'extremely dislike' it. ~No, I'll tell you what I feel thank you, I don't need your help.
- When people tell me to "watch my language"~ If they minded thier own business in the first place and weren't so interested in what i was saying, there wouldn't be a problem.
- When kids flip up thier shirt collars.~ It's not the 50's, and it's not a leather jacket, and it's not cool
- Those people who tell you that you have to have an opinion on everything.~ It's the same bastards who say you have to vote. Just shut up already!
- Kids who rant about about poitics like they know what the hell they are talking about, but actually don't.~ You don't vote!
- When people (usually kids, especially pathetic if they aren't) use the words 'like,' or 'um' too much.
- When people tell you that they are depressed, like they're bragging about it.~ It just makes me dislike them even more. No pity here. Same with showing off scars from "trying to kill yourself."
- People who can't swear right.~ The people who curse better than anyone would be Joe Pesci and Samuel L. Jackson. Used frequently, yet tastefully, yet somewhat sparingly. And with the right combination of words. I know plenty of kids who just vomits vulgarity without thinking about and it sounds stupid.
- When people say, "You're welcome" before you get a chance to say thank you.~ That's ruder than your hypothetical lack of thank you.
- Music Videos~ Lip synching looks stupid and tacky, and the camera shots are usually stupid and annoying and meant for a toddler with ADD. Every now and then you get a couple good ones, but all in all music videos are just pointless. Have nothing to do with the music, are cheesy, don't feel the music, and waste money.
- Definetly more to come....
Author Comments:
These are things that really chap my ass, and I'm just the sort to complain about it to anyone who cares to listen. Sorry if you are offended. That's all I can say.
ha, i truly hate two things you so appropriately mentioned, Jim morrison and the Doors, i don't think any mediocre band with an average song writer should ever achieve immortal icon status, though too many times, i.e. The Grateful Dead, Dave Matthews, etc. it happens.
I also hate Jon Stewart he can't say anything withoug snidely grinning
YOU ARE MY HERO!!!!!!
Just one comment, not all people that date down are trying to get "poon". I've dated people that are that much older, but aren't after that. Yes, some are, but not all.
I bet this is Jennifer.
Good list man! I'd say you hit the head on the nail on about 90-95% of these things.
Some other shit that sucks:
-Guitar Hero (ITS NOT A REAL GUITAR YOU LAZY POSERS) (sorry for violating previous rule)
-People who just badmouth everything, like its their job to throw a wet blanket on life, because being enthused is suddenly "gay" until you turn 30.
-People who can't take a joke.
-Traffic cops.
-Episodes on TV devoted to relationships. Ususally not funny and lame.
-People who get to college and still are living the "glory days" of high school. Yeah enjoy it now, because in 10 years you'll be fixing my BMW while I'm vacationing in Hawaii!
-As a runner, theres NOTHING that pisses me off more than hearing some douchebag yell "Run, Forrest! Ruuuunnn!"
-All boy bands, pop bands, and the like.
-The UNDUE attention given to lead singers and rappers. ANYBODY can sing, but it takes skill and patience to learn an instrument. And NO, air guitar doesnt count!
A third Halo one: kids who insist on TALKING about playing Halo.